Today was bittersweet, lol. It was sweet because we had another day off, but it was bitter because it may be our last day off until we leave :-(
Earlier, a few of us went to Ditch Plains and ate. Afterwards, a few of us went to see a friend in the city. It was pretty cool. We stayed late and it started to rain; once we hopped the train of course. We wounded up taking a taxi home from 125 and MLK Drive, lol.
Today was also nerve-wrecking, for personal reasons. I bought my greyhound bus ticket today and I got nervous afterwards. I realized that I literally have 20 dollars left to my name and that it has to last me for the remainder of time I spend here. That's not a lot of money at all so I don't feel too comfortable with that. I feel like I've exhausted all of my resources, but it wouldn't hurt to ask again I guess. It's funny because, I came here with the same problem and I kept a smile on for about a week. But one day while we were in the conference room, it took everything I had to hold back tears (tears that I eventually let pour once I hit the dorm). I had no money to do anything with. I mean, I went so far as to ask people who I never would have asked money for, for money. It got crazy.
God is amazing though. He made a way for me and blessed me with funds. I was so thankful. So, I need him to step through for me this time as well.
I've been going through situations like this for far too long. I mean, people complain about how "broke" they are and how they're so poor and all this other craziness. Meanwhile, they're ordering food everyday or rocking iPhones and the latest everything. It's pure insensitivity if you ask me. It angers me because they wouldn't know what poverty looked like if struck them in the face. And I'm definitely not blaming them for having resources, but at the same time people need to be more conscientious about what comes out of their mouths.
But I say all that to say that I had an epiphany. I realized that in order to get something you never had, you have to do something you never did. I cannot, will not and refuse to continue to live like this and repeat this cycle of not having any resources. I simply refuse. I can't continue this generational curse. I mean, that's why I'm here! I'm here because I want to see a change in my family for the better and I want to be successful not only for me, but for them. So something has to give and that something has got to give TODAY!
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